Be Happy!

Happiness.

You want it?

All you have to do is be grateful, and then write about it.

Sound simple?

It is!

Read the proof in this November 27, 2008 Science Daily article:
Want to quickly improve your happiness and satisfaction with life? Then the pen may be a mighty weapon, according to research done by Kent State University’s Dr. Steven Toepfer.

Toepfer, an assistant professor of family and consumer studies at university’s Salem Campus, says that expressive writing is something that has been available to mankind since ink first appeared in Egypt more than 4,000 years ago.

“Everyone is pursuing the American dream. We are wealthier than previous generations, consuming more and experiencing more, but yet so many of us are so unhappy,” Toepfer says. “The question of ‘is there something simple we can do to be happier?’ is one that I have been thinking about for many years and one that has interested people for much longer.”

With that question in mind, Toepfer enlisted students from six courses to explore the effects of writing letters of gratitude to people who had positively impacted the students’ lives. Over the course of a six-week period, students wrote one letter every two weeks with the simple ground rules that it had to be positively expressive, required some insight and reflection, were nontrivial and contained a high level of appreciation or gratitude.

After each letter, students completed a survey to gauge their moods, satisfaction with life and feelings of gratitude and happiness.

“I saw their happiness increase after each letter, meaning the more they wrote, the better they felt,” says Toepfer, who also witnessed improvement in participants’ life satisfaction and gratitude throughout the study. “The most powerful thing in our lives is our social network. It doesn’t have to be large, and you don’t always need to be the life of the party, but just having one or two significant connections in your life has shown to have terrific psychological and physical benefits.”

In all, 75 percent of the students said they planned to continue to write letters of gratitude even when the course was over.

Studies demonstrate, according to Toepfer, that practicing expressive writing is often associated with fewer health problems, decreased depression, an improved immune system and improved grades.

“We are all walking around with an amazing resource: gratitude,” says Toepfer. “It helps us express and enjoy, appreciate, be thankful and satisfied with a little effort. We all have it, and we need to use it to improve our quality of life.”

Try it for yourself.

What are you grateful for?

What blessings have been bestowed?

What gifts are yours?

Write it down.

Be grateful.

Be happy.

Simple as that.

How much is too much?

How much is enough?

When  does support become crippling or enabling?

Does unconditional love mean giving without end?

Too much help…

Can it keep one from self-sufficiency, self reliance?

What if the giver feels used, the gift taken for granted?

Please share your thoughts and experiences.

A Loved One with Mental Illness…

If you have a family member or friend who’s been diagnosed with a mental illness, you’re probably wondering what you can do to help. Although new forms of therapy and medication make it possible for many individuals to lead full, independent lives, the support of family, friends and peers remains an essential element in the recovery process.

What Is a Mental Illness?

(Much of the following has been adapted from material originally published in NAMI publications.) A mental illness is a disease that causes mild to severe disturbances in thought and behavior that results in an inability to cope with life’s ordinary demands and routines. There are more than 200 classified forms of mental illness, all of which can be triggered by a variety of causes: a particular situation or series of events, an illness, genetics, biochemical imbalances, or any combination of those factors. Above all, it’s important to remember that there is help and hope for your loved one.

Encourage a Dialogue for Recovery

A key element in recovery is a productive, two-way communication between patient and doctor. Encouraging your friend or family member to foster this type of relationship with his or her team of healthcare professionals can make a big difference in helping your loved one to recover. There are also many other ways you can help people cope with their disorder, get treatment and work toward recovery. Here are some tips for supporting someone close to you.

Support Strategies

Accept your feelings. You may find yourself denying the warning signs, worrying what other people will think due to stigma, or wondering what caused your loved one to become ill. Accept that these feelings are normal and common among others in your situation.

Educate yourself. Learn about the diagnosis, symptoms and available treatments. Local Mental Health America affiliates, public libraries and the Internet are all good resources.

Be compassionate. Recognize that your family member or friend may feel scared and confused after receiving a diagnosis. Although some people are relieved to get diagnosed and actively seek treatment, it may feel devastating to others.

Motivate. Encourage your loved one to learn about what treatments and services will promote recovery. Recognize that finding the right treatment or services can take time, and can involve a process of trial and error.

Practice “active listening.” Listen to your family member or friend and express your understanding back to them. Acknowledge the feelings he or she is experiencing and don’t discount them, even if you believe them to be symptoms of the illness.

Coping with unusual behavior. Certain behaviors people with mental illnesses may exhibit can be disruptive- especially in public-and difficult to accept. The next time you and your loved one visit his or her mental health professional, discuss these behaviors together and develop a strategy for coping.

Understand the challenges of medication. Although treatments have improved tremendously in the past decade, they can also lead to side effects that can make your family member or friend want to stop taking the medicine. Encourage your loved one to speak immediately to his or her health care provider about any problems related to medications.

Understand that it’s not just about medication. Recovery from mental illness isn’t only a matter of “just staying on your medications.” Self-esteem, social support and a feeling of contributing to society are also essential elements of recovery and should be supported.

Offer practical help. Offer to drive or accompany your family member or friend to medical and other appointments. And, if he or she wants you to, discuss the treatment, side effects or other issues with the doctor and treatment team.

Give respect. Always respect the individual’s need for and right to privacy. People with mental illnesses have the same right to be treated with dignity and respect as anyone else.

Establish a support network. Seek out your own support from family and friends. Self-help and support groups also provide an opportunity to talk with other people who are experiencing the same types of issues you are. They can listen and offer valuable advice.

Take time out. Schedule time for yourself to help you keep things in perspective. Making sure you pursue your own interests will help you have more patience and compassion toward your loved one. You can only help others when you are physically and emotionally healthy yourself. Also, make sure any other family members aren’t feeling ignored, and set aside quality time to spend together.

Maintain hope. There is hope for recovery, and with treatment, many people who have mental illnesses return to productive and fulfilling lives.

What are the symptoms of bipolar disorder?

Bipolar mood changes are called “mood episodes.”

People may have manic episodes, depressive episodes, or “mixed” episodes.

A mixed episode has both manic and depressive symptoms.

These mood episodes cause symptoms that last a week or two-sometimes longer.

During an episode, the symptoms last every day for most of the day.

Mood episodes are intense.

The feelings are strong and happen along with extreme changes in behavior and energy levels.

People experiencing a manic episode may:

• Feel very “up” or “high”
• Feel “jumpy” or “wired”
• Talk really fast about a lot of different things
• Be agitated, irritable, or “touchy”
• Have trouble relaxing or sleeping
• Think they can do a lot of things at once and are more active than usual
• Do risky things, like spend a lot of money or have reckless sex

People experiencing a depressive episode may:

• Feel very “down” or sad
• Feel worried and empty
• Have trouble concentrating
• Forget things a lot
• Lose interest in fun activities and become less active
• Feel tired or “slowed down”
• Have trouble sleeping
• Think about death or suicide

People experiencing a mixed state have symptoms of both a manic episode and a major depressive episode at the same time.

Want to know more? Click here.

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How can I help someone I know with bipolar disorder?

Help your friend or relative see a doctor to get the right diagnosis and treatment. You may need to make the appointment and go with him or her to the doctor.

Here are some helpful things you can do:

Be patient

Encourage your friend or relative to talk, and listen to him or her carefully

Be understanding about mood swings

Include your friend or relative in fun activities

Remind him or her that getting better is possible with the right treatment

How does bipolar disorder affect friends and family?

When a friend or relative has bipolar disorder, it affects you too. Taking care of someone with bipolar disorder can be stressful. You have to cope with the mood swings and sometimes other problems, such as drinking too much. Sometimes the stress can strain your relationships with other people. Caregivers can miss work or lose free time.

If you are taking care of someone with bipolar disorder, take care of yourself too. With good self care, you will do a better job, and it might help your loved one stick to his or her treatment.

Click here for bipolar symptoms.