I care for someone with a serious mental illness.

Sometimes the illness “gets in the way.”

What are appropriate boundaries, and how do I set them?

1. Discuss how you hope to treat others and how you expect to be treated.
2. Agree on a format for solution when these expectations are not met.
3. Plan and stick to individual, separate activities as well as “together time.”
4. Respect one another’s privacy and clearly establish times or topics that are off limits.
5. Do not tolerate self injury, violence or abuse of any kind.
   If they occur, seek help or tell someone immediately.
6. Safety is a top priority. If you question anyone’s safety, get help. Call a responsible adult or dial 911.
7. Expect that your relationship will be kind, supportive and loving. Always work toward that goal.

What skills or strategies will help me deal with a family member or friend with a mental illness?

1. Show compassion. Being diagnosed with a mental illness can be scary and confusing. Some people are relieved by a diagnosis and actively seek treatment; others may be devastated, ashamed or in denial.
2. Encourage your loved one to learn about treatments and services. Remind them that finding the right treatment or services takes time and involves some trial and error.
3. Practice “active listening.” Listen and then express your understanding back. Acknowledge his/her feelings. Don’t discount them, even if you believe them to be symptoms of the illness.
4. Understand medication challenges. Side effects often make people want to stop taking their medicine. Urge them to take their meds and talk to the doctor about making adjustments.
5. Know that recovery isn’t just about staying on medication. Self-esteem, social support and contributing to society are essential elements of recovery.
6. Learn to cope with unusual behavior. People with mental illnesses are sometimes disruptive or behave in an embarrassing way. If this happens, tell a responsible party, like a parent or doctor. This information can lead to more effective treatment.

I love someone who has a serious mental illness.

How can I prevent our relationship from being all about mental illness?

1. Participate in normal, fun activities together. Watch movies, play games, go for walks, etc.
2. Establish “no health-talk” times.
3. Work together on necessary tasks, such as cooking, grocery shopping and gardening.
4. Create routines and schedules that encourage living healthfully and well.
5. Always be respectful, kindand supportive. And expect the same in return.

How can I have healthy relationships with family members and friends living with a mental illness?

1. Offer practical help. Drive or be present at appointments.
2. Give respect. Honor the need for, and right to, privacy; and always treat others with dignity and respect regardless of circumstance.
3. Establish a support network. Seek your own support from family and friends. Self-help and support groups also provide an opportunity to talk with others in similar situations.
4. Take time out. Pursuing your own interests will help you remain patient and compassionate. You can only help others when you are physically and emotionally healthy.
5. Maintain hope. There is hope for recovery, and with treatment, many people with mental illnesses have happy, productive, fulfilling lives.

I have a family history of mental illness.

What should I watch for, in myself, to remain healthy?

1. If you have a family history of mental illness, avoid drugs and alcohol. They can trigger the illness.
2. If you’re worried about your own mental health, keep a daily log or journal of your concerns.
3. Learn symptoms and signs of onset and monitor yourself for these.
4. Confide in someone you trust and ask them to tell you if you exhibit these symptoms or behaviors.
5. Talk to your parents, school counselor or doctor if you are worried about your own mental health.
6. To maintain good mental health, eat a well-balanced diet, get at least 30 minutes of physical exercise every day, sleep 8 or more hours each night and avoid drugs and alcohol.

What can I do if I’m concerned about the mental health status of a family member or friend?

1. Write down the behaviors or actions that worry you. Be as specific as possible.
2. If your friend is another teen, talk to their parents or school counselor.
3. At a time when you both are calm and comfortable, share your list and the fact that these are symptoms of an illness that can be treated.
4. If he/she already has a mental health diagnosis, encourage a return visit to the doctor.
5. If no diagnosis has been made, stress the fact that these symptoms require medical assessment and treatment.

I care about someone with a mental illness.

What can I do to help?

• Accept the diagnosis without placing blame.
• Educate yourself. Learn the facts about symptoms and treatment to alleviate your fear.
• Remember, despite symptoms, this is the same person you care for.
• Know that there is help and hope for your loved one.
• Continue to offer love and support.

What is mental illness?

• A mental illness is a disease that causes disturbances in thought and/or behavior.
• Mental illness makes it hard to cope with ordinary demands and routines.
• Mental illness can be triggered by a variety of causes, including a stressful situation or series of events, another illness, genetics, biochemical imbalances, or a combination of those factors.

Are you the parent of a teen?

Get that kid to bed by 10!

According to a new study published in the journal, Sleep, parents who enforce earlier bedtimes are doing their teens a big favor.

Why?

Kids who stay up until midnight or later are 24 percent more likely to be depressed and 20 percent more likely to have suicidal thoughts, than teens with bed times of 10 p.m. or earlier.

Dr. James E. Gangwisch and his colleagues of Columbia University Medical Center in New York City made the discovery. According to Dr. Gangwisch, “It’s… a common idea that older adolescents don’t need as much sleep as younger adolescents, but that’s really not true–they still need about 9 hours of sleep at night.” Depression has long been linked to inadequate sleep in both teens and adults. The team’s report verifies this fact and notes the connection could be “bidirectional”-meaning getting too little sleep boosts depression risk, while being depressed makes it harder to sleep.

Gangwisch’s team looked at over 15,000 seventh- through twelfth-graders who, along with their parents, were surveyed in 1994-1996. Fifty-four percent of parents said their teens had to go to bed at 10 p.m. or earlier on school nights. Twenty-one percent set bedtime at 11 p.m., and twenty-five percent allowed their children to stay up until midnight or later. More than two-thirds of the teens said they went to bed when they were supposed to.

Considering the possibility that parents who were stricter about bedtime might have other traits or behaviors that protect their child from depression, the researchers analyzed the relationships between the teens and their parents and then accounted for this in their study.

They found no link between a set bedtime and how much teens felt their parents cared for them, but there was a strong relationship between bedtimes and whether or not the teens felt they got enough sleep. Adding to the importance of getting enough sleep, the team learned that kids who got five hours of sleep nightly or less were seventy-one percent more likely to be depressed, and forty percent more likely to have suicidal thoughts than their peers who got eight or more hours of sleep a night.

“Getting adequate sleep is really important for our mental health as well as being able to focus and have the necessary energy and motivation to do the things we need to do during the day,” Gangwisch noted.

So, parents of teens, take note: Eight or more hours of sleep are vital to your teen’s mental health. Staying up late is not to be considered a privilege, but rather a health risk.

Glenn Close’s nephew, Calen Pick, is diagnosed with schizophrenia. Here, he and his cousin, Close’s daughter Annie Starke, discuss living with the stigma surrounding mental illness.

Additional video and information can be found at www.bringchange2mind.org